Chapter 7: The Woman’s Obligation

Chapter 7: The Woman’s Obligation

Souls of Women in the Field of Yokes

     The Greek word for yoke is “zugos”: which means a coupling of two parties or servitude by way of law or obligation. All women are to be under the yoke of Christ. If we serve Him, we must follow Him and where He is, we ought to be there also. If we serve Him He will honor us. (John 12:26). We are to present ourselves to Christ as slaves for obedience. We are slaves to the one whom we obey, either of sin resulting in death, or of obedience resulting in righteousness. (Rom 6:16) The soul of a woman is always under a yoke, whether it be Christ, materialism, some wrong man, herself, or another idol. When her soul is under Christ’s yoke, she is also under the yoke of her God-given authorities (e.g. husband, parents, etc.) There is no way to be under Christ’s yoke and be outside of the yoke of God-given authorities. It is possible for her soul to be under the yoke of God-given authorities, yet to be outside of the yoke of Christ. For example, if her submission is based on fear, then in her obedience, she still refuses to come under the yoke of Christ. just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear. (I Peter 3:6) When her soul is under the yoke of her own self, she may try to rule over men, both God-given authorities and other men.
     God has given fathers, husbands, and church leaders who abide in the Truth as authorities to women. Following are some important things for us to remember as we seek to please our Lord by honoring the authorities that He has placed over us:

     Define your desire for freedom. You are prone to desire freedom without laying down your terms. What do you mean when you claim to desire freedom? Freedom for what and freedom to do what? What is it that you truly want in life? You want freedom to obey. You want freedom to live and act in the imputed righteousness of Christ. The freedom you desire is a freedom of soul to remain in a state of peace and joy in the midst of any yoke, gentle or harsh, that God has placed over you. What do you want freedom from? You do not necessarily want freedom from oppression or pain. You want freedom from the wickedness of your own sinful nature. In the submission of yourself, rather than becoming constrained or restricted, your soul will be set free. In obeying you will not become enslaved, rather, you are entering the domain of Spiritual freedom. Outside of this domain, your soul will be nothing but imprisoned to despair and guilt.

I shall run the way of Your commandments,
For You will enlarge my heart. Ps 119


     Remember that His will is good, acceptable, and perfect. You will never be apart from His will in submitting to the authority that He has placed over you. Though you may feel that you are Spiritually hindered by something that you are commanded to do, remember that His will is good, acceptable, and PERFECT. He will never have you to sacrifice one item of righteousness to fulfill another. His narrow way consists of pure obedience and you cannot falter at any point. He is able to sustain you and provide for you in ways that you cannot imagine at the present time.

And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect. Rom 12
     In your attitude of respect, do not forget the grace that you stand in. Remember that you are forgiven regardless of what is conveyed to you through others. In the midst of condemnation you may remain quiet just as Christ was like “a sheep before her shearers is silent”. Remember that God will defend you. Christ intercedes for you. Jesus stands at your right hand to save you from those who judge your soul. Love, respect, and obey, but never forget that there is no condemnation for you because you are in Christ Jesus.

30 With my mouth I will give thanks abundantly to the Lord;
And in the midst of many I will praise Him.
31 For He stands at the right hand of the needy,
To save him from those who judge his soul. Ps 109


     Love your authorities. Obey the higher law of love. Not only must you obey, but you must seek Him and wrestle with Him until He gives you an unconditional love for your authorities. Continually pray for your authorities. You must continue to watch and pray otherwise you will surely fall into temptation. You need Him every hour. You must keep praying and seeking for God to correct the attitude of your heart. And once it has been corrected, you must continue to let the Spirit purge your soul in this regard. The agape that the Father grants you for your authorities will form a solid foundation for your obedience. Without love, submission is tremendously more difficult. Communicate your heart whether or not your feelings are treated well. With unconditional love, do not be aloof or non-communicative, but pour out your heart in love and humility.

Owe nothing to anyone except to love one another; for he who loves his neighbor has fulfilled the law. For this, “You shall not commit adultery, You shall not murder, You shall not steal, You shall not covet,” and if there is any other commandment, it is summed up in this saying, “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” 10 Love does no wrong to a neighbor; therefore love is the fulfillment of the law. Rom 13

     Know that the benefits of the conformance of yourself into the Image of Christ far exceed any temporary pain of obedience. The pain of the flesh during submission is a figment of the effect of pride on your mind. This pride will lock your mind and behavior into rebellion unless you allow Him to crucify it immediately as many times as you need to. The internal resistance to obey and respect and the resulting external flippant disrespect are easily washed away if only you will choose to deny self and remember His work on the cross. Your obedience is far less painful that you imagine it to be in the midst of your pride. The feeling of the breaking of pride is all in your head. The obedience and time afterwards will be an easy downhill journey. The breaking of the deception of your pride is the most difficult part. The minutes of momentary struggle are achieving for you a lifetime of peace and contentment in Christ. Once you overcome, remember the tremendous benefits to your character.

But now you also, put them all aside: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and abusive speech from your mouth. Do not lie to one another, since you laid aside the old self with its evil practices, 10 and have put on the new self who is being renewed to a true knowledge according to the image of the One who created him— Col 3

     Look for His gifts and be gladdened by them. He will always encourage your heart with a special blessing and a “mercy for each hour”.
And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that always having all sufficiency in everything, you may have an abundance for every good deed; as it is written,
 He scattered abroad, he gave to the poor,
His righteousness endures forever.” 2 Cor 9


     Remember that God will administer His justice in His time. When your authorities are His children, the Father is infinitely more concerned with their holiness and righteousness than you are. He is at this very moment laboring on behalf of your and their progress in the faith. He is working to achieve true justice for all of His people so that their knowledge of Christ will be so great that regardless of what trials and temptations come their way, they will be hidden in the love, joy, and peace of Christ. For those yokes who are still in darkness, the destruction that awaits them is incomprehensibly terrible. View this even as a driving force for you to submit, knowing that His Gospel may be revealed in your submission so that they may escape this destruction by the knowledge of His great salvation.

21 For you have been called for this purpose, since Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example for you to follow in His steps, 22 who committed no sin, nor was any deceit found in His mouth; 23 and while being reviled, He did not revile in return; while suffering, He uttered no threats, but kept entrusting Himself to Him who judges righteously; I Peter 2

The Prison of Feminism

     Since the curse of woman given to Eve, ungodly women have dealt with the "desire for her husband" who would "rule over her" in many ways. One of these "coping mechanisms" is feminism. Feminism is at its root: a hatred for men and women alike. We must not think that we are free from feminism because we do not call ourselves "feminist". We are tempted by the devil often in subtle and more obvious ways to think that it is our right to rule over men. Ruling over men is actually a curse and a destroying punishment given to an ungodly nation.

O My people! Their oppressors are children,
And women rule over them.
O My people! Those who guide you lead you astray
And confuse the direction of your paths. Is 3:12

     When men falter or when they are more ignorant than we would desire, we are tempted to try to rule over them. We must realize that this attitude has destroyed the culture of America. Go through the (often dark) tunnel of willing loving obedience to our authorities and He will bring us all into a glorious light of Spiritual blessing in Christ. Remember how the church submits to Christ, who loved her and gave Himself up for her. What if she had tried to rule over Christ, we would have damned ourselves. 

    Feminism is a prison that wounded women lock themselves into. We must pray for, love, and minister to these hurting women. And we should realize that everything we have is a gift from the Father. If we think that we are standing we ought to beware lest we fall under the same deception. 

The Sisterly Obligation

     As the increase of wickedness has come upon our society, the love of most has grown cold. This may have a devastating effect on women whose hearts are not captured by the King. God has given women a sisterly love for one another. For young, single, widowed, divorced, and unloved women, the Godly sisterly love of other women could be one of the greatest blessings in their lives. The life of woman who feels unloved can be deathly and many women have been blinded to God’s love for them.

21 Under three things the earth quakes,
And under four, it cannot bear up:
22 Under a slave when he becomes king,
And a fool when he is satisfied with food,
23 Under an unloved woman when she gets a husband,
And a maidservant when she supplants her mistress.
Prov 30

     It is true that for many women, the most affection that they receive is from a man who lusts for her. Her sisters in Christ have ignored God’s calling to come alongside this woman and love her with the powerful love of Christ. It is a pity that we have not laid down our lives for our sisters. Think of the women whom you know (perhaps yourself) who are no longer virgins because sought the affection of a man and sold her body in the process. What if we had come around her and loved her to death. What if we prayed with her, listened to her, visited her in her home, called her to study the Bible with us, hugged her, lived life with her…all the while showing her the love of the Father. She could have been rescued. We have despised her by ignoring her for when we know the good that we ought to do, and fail to do it, we sin (James 4:17).

Remember what David said after Jonathan’s death?

“I am distressed for you, my brother Jonathan;
You have been very pleasant to me.
Your love to me was more wonderful
Than the love of women. 2 Sam 1:26

Does Not Even Nature Itself Teach You…

     This section will be a journey for me to write because I am going to attempt to communicate some “soulish” intuitions about the nature of the man’s authority over the woman in human words. I may end up not including this section in my book if it is not written coherently, but I pray that Lord-willing you and I will learn something from this. In the past year I have been trying to understand the authority of a man over a woman as described in Paul’s instructions to the Corinthian church about the necessity for women to wear head coverings.  In Paul’s instructions he conveyed that Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of woman, and God is the head of Christ. The head covering is a symbol of authority on the woman’s head. Paul asks, “Does not even nature itself teach you that if a man has long hair, it is a dishonor to him, but if a woman has long hair, it is a glory to her? For her hair is given to her as a covering” For a woman to pray or prophesy with her head uncovered is a disgrace. And for a man to cover his head is a disgrace. For man is the image and glory of God; and woman is the glory of man. Man does not originate from woman, but woman from man. Man was not created for the woman’s sake, but woman for the man’s sake. However, in the Lord, neither man nor woman is independent from one another. (see 1 Cor 11:1-16) God created woman from the man’s rib as a helper suitable for him. The man said that she was now bone of his bones and flesh of his flesh because she was taken out of him. And for this reason a man shall leave his father and mother, be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. (Gen 2:20-23) Thus, there are innate God-ordained differences between men and women:

1.     The woman is the glory of man.
2.     The woman originates from man [was taken out of him] and becomes one with him.
3.     The woman was created for man’s sake, to be a suitable helper.

     I have had a list of FAQs about these things for several years and I am going to write a summary of my journey of understanding what little I have come to understand. These FAQs included “Which man am I the glory of?”, “Which man was I created for the sake of?”, “Which man am I a suitable helper for?”, “Do these items apply to myself with regard to all men, all Christian men, Christian authority figures who are men, or only my father/husband?”, “How do these things apply to me in my singleness?”, “What exactly is authority?”, “What are the implications of oneness in flesh?”…and many others.

     I must admit that the culture of my upbringing does not seem to have benefited me in any way to understand the natural order that God has created. Dad and mom would have been a good example to me had I understood the true relationship between them. Dad and mom’s relationship could be described this way: mom pretends like she is the boss, but really dad is the boss and they both know it. I only realized this in the past few years, and thus most of my childhood, I was never taught and rarely, if ever, saw the God-ordained order of authority between men and woman displayed. But when I read the 1 Cor 11 and Gen 2 passage, I had realized that there is something very Spiritual and natural going on here between men and women. And yet our wicked culture has so quenched this ordination that we have altogether lost our understanding of it. I have needed the Spirit and Word to restore this lost understanding of the natural and Spiritual differences between men and women.

      Firstly, I will explain my present conviction about woman’s head coverings. I went through I period of time [about 2 years ago] when I covered my head during church. I did this in faith, having felt confused and uneasy whenever I read the 1 Cor 11 passage. I had no clue if God truly wanted me to cover my head, but I did so in faith. The passage said that women should cover the heads and I decided to obey. The first Sunday that I did so was very informative. God gave me comfort in my fear of the opinions of others, and I felt a kind of protection that I had never felt before. I felt that my soul was covered by the life of Christ. Of course, this had been true since I put my faith in Him, but I felt it in greater degree. In fact, though I expected to feel more honor and respect for my earthly father, the greater effect was an increased knowledge of Christ’s covering over me. The covering seemed to remove all subtleties of sensuality, pride, and, surprisingly, insecurity. I do not know how to explain this well enough. The Sundays after that first Sunday were not so inspirational and I eventually settled into a mode where my head covering made no difference whatsoever to my heart’s attitude as it had the first Sunday. I realized that I had been given an introduction to the nature of authority. Eventually I stopped wearing a head covering and I no longer felt guilty not to do so, though that does not make me faultless. The Lord is my Judge and Savior. I was informed that in the Corinthian church culture, most noble women would cover their heads, always, not only in church. Whereas, the prostitutes of the time, who were not under the authority of a husband, father, or any other Godly man, would not cover their heads. Thus, for a woman not to cover her head indicated that she was wanton, rebellious, sensual, brazen, and forsaking of Godly authority. Thus, both the good and bad angels, who lack omniscience, could see the outward manifestation of a woman’s heart by her action of covering or not covering her head. I heard some present-day men of God explain that the application of head coverings for the present day would be for a woman not to dress in the same way as the worldly women of the present day, but rather in a way that shows that she is in submission to Christ and Godlyauthorities. So though the prostitutes and magazine-cover women wear sensual clothing, I ought to be set-apart in purity and chastity in the way that I dress. My present conviction is that I ought to dress in a way that honors God and shows myself as set-apart from the culture of the day, in a way that shows I am in submission to God and my father, and not looking for inordinate affairs with wrong types of people. If God truly wants me to cover my head, I pray that He brings me to the point of conviction again…

     So my inward grappling with the ideals behind head coverings introduced me to these Spiritual mysteries of the God-ordained structure between men and women. Another event that happened was when Anand told me something very heart-breaking last year, and I thank him, because the hurt of it has healed with the Truth that I learned thereafter in my pursuit of comfort. He said, “Not many men are going to be able to lead you” and it stung greatly. I replied earnestly, “What do you mean? Why? What is wrong with me?” He replied that a man has to be extremely Godly to lead me. I initially started to comfort myself with the thought that I really was not as Godly as Anand thought and that he had not really seen my bad side completely. I also questioned what exactly a man needed to be able to lead me. Did he have to be much more intelligent than me? Did he have to have more knowledge of the Bible than me? Did he have to have a deeper prayer life than men? Did he have to simply be 20 years older or 2 feet taller than me so that there was no way I could threaten his authority? Did he have to just be approved of by dad and Anand? Did he have to be extremely strong in the areas where my flesh is weak? LORD, WHAT DOES A MAN NEED IN ORDER TO LEAD ME??? After Anand made this comment, I asked dad whether he thought that there were men who could lead me. His response was even more strange, “Yes, there are probably some men out there, but they would have to be very humble and desire only to build God’s Kingdom”. So then, again, I started questioning, “Does the man need to have a greater desire for God’s Kingdom’s advance than me to lead me?” and “Why would humility help a man lead me?

     My first glimmer of hope came from The Story of Ian and Larissa, for which I am very grateful to God. Ian underwent a serious accident during their “courtship” and was put in a wheel-chair, unable to work, have children, speak properly, and other disabilities”. Larissa chose to marry him. She sacrificed her life to take care of him and to show him love and respect as his wife. The one thing that caused me to understand more about what a man needs in order to lead a woman was her sharing about how her husband led her. She gave an example in which Ian would just barely, with great struggle, be able to mumble the words, “God is good”, and Larissa would be led by these words and her soul would follow his lead for the day by his statement. Larissa was choosing to be led by Ian who could not work, elaborately teach or speak, give her children, physically comfort, or do most of the things which young women dream of their husbands doing for them. And yet, she wholeheartedly was led by him. What did Ian have that he could lead Larissa? What did Larissa have that she could be led by him? I realized that Ian had exactly what he needed: he had the anointing of the Spirit, faith, and the love of Christ. Larissa had exactly what she needed: humility, purity, faithfulness, servant-hood, and respect. She clearly understood the Biblical premise that she was made for her husband and sacrificed many earthly comforts to fulfill God’s calling in her life. She notes that God gave her a supernatural joy and peace in the midst of her sacrifice. She likely feels very blessed by Ian and does not consider herself as having made a sacrifice. Their testimony has encouraged numerous saints throughout the world to truly seek God to use their marriages to display the eternal Covenant between Christ and the church.

     There were several other questions I had when I felt anointed by the Spirit to write letters to the saints that I know. I knew that women were not to speak in the church or to authoritatively teach men and that positions of authority such as pastor and eldership were to be granted to men alone. Unlike some other women who felt threatened by these church ordinances, I felt protected by them. I felt extremely uncomfortable trying to imagine myself being a leader/teacher in the church over men [sorry, but I sometimes could not help but imagine every possible scenario of a given train of thought]. It felt like blaspheme to my soul to think of assuming any authority over any man, even young men. I attribute this feeling to the ordinate desires granted to me in my regenerated spirit. The flesh must be crucified continually in order to walk according to the desires of the regenerated spirit. I currently have much peace in writing letters, knowing that I assume no authority over men, and that I am under Christ’s and my earthly father’s authority. And if I speak Truth from the Scriptures, God in His authority uses His Word with His own power in the hearts of His people. It appears that the Godly men who are very secure in their God-given manhood, are most willing to be encouraged by a sister in Christ with no fear, because they understand my soul, and do not view me as an authoritative teacher, but as a dear sister who is sharing her testimony of her heart/minds interaction with the Word for the encouragement of the saints. My conscience is clear, because I have assumed no authority over men, and Lord willing, I write in agape and humility. I thought back to the state of my soul in the presence of men over the years. I realized that whenever I had been in the presence of a man, my soul subconsciously went under the headship of some of them. It was not something I consciously decided to have happen, but if I was in the presence of men, especially Christian men who had the Spirit of God indwelling them, my soul somehow yielded itself in respect. My voice and demeanor became more respectful, quieter, and gentle. Even if I was sharing a testimony of something God was teaching me [“praying and prophesying”], if men were present, my physical being subjected itself to my soul’s submission to any Spiritual male heads present. Whereas, I noticed that when I was with only women and children, I became more authoritative and outspoken, and assumed more responsibility. Sadly, there were probably some instances in my earlier life as a teenager when my soul was wrongly seduced to respect men that I ought to have avoided and I was quite uncomfortable and “lost” in doing so. Any yokes apart from Christ and His ordained yokes are cruel masters.I realize now that every inordinate affair in a woman’s heart originates from the inordinate subjection of her soul to the wrong authority. Though in some sense, coarse sensuality in a woman defies the authority of all men and she seeks to usurp her role as a woman by her wantonness. Eventually, I learned that not only did a man need the Lord’s anointing [the clear, humble, and loving heart of faith] to lead me, but God had given me a natural inclination to follow the man. These inclinations of Godly men to lead and of Godly women to follow are items which are manifested in the heavenly realms. The nature of such authority and submission structure is instituted by God in the heavenly realms, being manifested in our physical behavior. This structure does not depend on and does not even necessarily involve the physical talents of either man or woman. Thus, a woman like Larissa who is physically stronger, smarter, and more “able” in an earthly sense at just about everything than Ian, can submit to, honor, respect, and follow her husband. And Ian can truly lead Larissa with a clear conscience and a strong bold authority with no qualms about his physical weaknesses. Why? Because this authority structure is ordained by God and it remains.  “When all things are subjected to Him, then the Son Himself also will be subjected to the One who subjected all things to Him, so that God may be all in all (1 Cor 15:28)

     My understanding was confirmed by some words from a sermon by Paul WasherRecovering Biblical Womanhood”. He explains [min 10-12] that though a woman is able to be fulfilled and sustained in all ways by Christ, she was also made to be Spiritually led by Godly men. I have realized that if I am walking by faith, my soul immediately and faithfully resorts under the headship of God-ordained authorities: always my parents, and other Godly men such as Anand. However, the saints throughout the world are living in a day when most men are not taking responsibility to abide in the Word; this has greatly limited the pool of Godly men to which Godly women ought to submit themselves to [of course, we must show proper respect to all men].

     Just as there is a Spiritual order of headship between man and woman, there is also a type of authority that is granted to the elderly. A gray hair is a crown of glory (Prov 16:31) and the Israelites were commanded to rise up before the gray headed, to honor the aged, and to revere their Lord and God (Lev 19:32). One reason why the elderly are to be given respect, is that there is a general tendency for older men to have more wisdom and experience. For foolishness is bound in a child’s heart, but wisdom and understanding accompanies ages men and a long life (Job 12:12). We remember the example of King Rehoboam who was given good advice by his elders, yet, he rejected his counsel and listened to the evil younger men’s counsel (1 Chron 10). Peter told the younger men to be subject to their elders and to clothe themselves with humility towards one another (1 Peter 5:5). Paul told Timothy not to sharply rebuke and older man, but to rather appeal to him as a father (1 Tim 5:1). However, there is something that seems to surpass the authority of age itself, and that is the subjection of the soul of a man to Christ. As King David says, “I understand more than the aged, because I have observed Your precepts (Ps 119:100)”.  Similarly, Paul told Timothy not to let anyone look down on his youthfulness, but to show himself as an example to the believers in speech, conduct, love, faith, and purity (1 Tim 4:12). When a man is walking by the Spirit, regardless of his age or physical talent, Godly authority is bestowed to him. Another example of this is God’s sovereign election of Jacob over Esau. God told Rebekah that the older would serve the younger (Rom 9:12).

    Finally, there is something about the nature of a man and woman’s oneness in flesh that is in stark contrast to what the world teaches us about the relationship between men and women. For in secular media, our society and our children are constantly taught that the love of a man for a woman is conditional. She must be irresistibly beautiful all the time, a wonder woman, money-making, interior decorating, cuisine artist, socially adept, perfect mother….in order to be loved by her husband. Somehow, the world teaches us that women who are not beautiful, physically talented, or capable are not worthy of unconditional love. The beautiful irresistible damsel in distress is rescued, saved, and sacrificed for…but the rest of the real damsels in the world who are not beautiful or “worthy” are left in the pit of destruction. Do we see how utterly contradictory this is to the nature of our Christ for His bride. While we were still sinners, in horrifying distortion of Spiritual beauty, He demonstrated His love to give Himself for us. He calls us a part of Himself. Each one is apt to love and take care of himself, whether or not he thinks himself to be worthy. Similarly, for a man to consider his wife to be one flesh with himself, he shows her unconditional love, whether or not she is worthy. Here in this love, she is filled with deep respect for him, and in her deep respect, his heart is filled with tender response….you know how this goes J. There is a general tenderness that all Godly men are to have for all Godly woman as Paul tells Timothy to treat the older women as mothers, and the younger women as sisters, in all purity (1 Tim 5:2).

    I could go on and on but will stop here. I am still in the process of understanding these things which once upon a time, were understood in the hearts of many, but in our ungodly and crooked generation, are like buried treasure, that only the Spirit and Word can revive in our hearts and minds. 

“Because of the Angels”

     At the time of our conversion, the heart of stone has been removed from our flesh and the heart of flesh has been placed within us. Our false affections for everything that comes from the world, namely, the boastful pride of life and the lust of the eyes and flesh, are removed from us, and the persisting gift of faith and love for Christ is implanted in our new heart and spirit. Yes, such a gift of true affection for Christ results in obedience. As Christ tells us, “If you love Me, you will keep My commandments”. 

     Here, I want to discuss a particular unregenerate desire that ought to have been removed from us at the time of regeneration. This desire may still come to the forefront of our consciousness when we fail to keep in step with the Spirit, and thus we are in a journey of putting to death this desire by the power of the Spirit, yes, even the resurrection power that is ours in Christ Jesus. This desire which I speak of here is that of the woman to be worshiped, in essence, for what she is physically. This desire is her longing to be cherished, worshiped, adored, sought after, desired, and relished because of what she is physically. I do not mean to say that such a longing for love is inherently an unregenerate desire. For surely the daughter of the King, a virgin in heart, will deeply desire affection from her heavenly Father, and Christ her elder Brother through the Spirit who pours such love into her heart. But this desire is on the basis of Christ alone and nothing about her physical self or even moral self apart from Christ. But the unregenerate desire to be worshiped is a desire in a woman to be worshiped for a temporal reason by, often times, though not in all cases, an inordinate source. The primary example I refer to is the woman who seeks to be worshiped by a man, whom she is not pledged to marry, because of her physical beauty. Does the very mention of this example appall you?  Does it sound so far removed from you, dear sister, that you feel that you have scarce harbored such a desire inside of you prior to this day? May the Spirit reveal to you the infinite subtleties within you that are forms of this unregenerate desire. For if you would but look at the world around you, the women around you, the media, the culture, the music, the style, the dress, yes, even within your own consciousness, it may surprise you to realize that this very desire has infiltrated the vast majority of the hearts of all women. Most women unknowingly or knowingly seek to be worshiped by men who are not their own. 

     But dear sister, there is an example that the Lord has shown me that applies very directly to this sinful desire which results in a sinful condition of the soul that evades much of our behavior. When Paul healed a man at Lystra, the crowds saw what he had done and said, “The gods have become like men and have come down to us”. They began to worship Paul and Barnabas as though they themselves were gods. What was their response when they heard these remarks from the people? They tore their robes and rushed out into the crowd, crying out and saying, “Men, why are you doing these things? We are also men of the same nature as you, and preach the Gospel to you that you should turn from these vain things to a living God, WHO MADE THE HEAVEN AND THE EARTH AND THE SEA AND ALL THAT IS IN THEM. In the generations gone by He permitted all the nations to go their own ways; and yet He did not leave Himself without witness, in that He did good and gave you rains from heaven and fruitful seasons, satisfying your hearts with food and gladness” (Acts 14).
    This response of Paul and Barnabas ought to be our attitude and response to worship that we receive from men. Our hearts and mouths should cry, “Far be it from me that I should be worshipped by you, dear brother. Worship the Lord alone for He is worthy of glory and honor and thanks”. Or would be steal His glory and relish the worship of our selves by other men? Think of all of the time, money, energy, and heart that you use to make yourself physically desirable for the worship by random men who are not your husband! 

     The core heart condition is that you seek to be worshipped. You are trying to steal the glory that belongs to the Lord of the universe and, interestingly, to your husband or your husband to be, if you are not yet married. For a man ought not to have his head covered, since he is the image and glory of God; but the woman is the glory of man. For man does not originate from woman, but woman from man; for indeed man was not created for the woman’s sake, but woman for the man’s sake. THEREFORE THE WOMAN OUGHT TO HAVE A SYMBOL OF AUTHORITY ON HER HEAD, BECAUSE OF THE ANGELS. (1 Cor 11:7-11). I have described in a prior chapter that we can learn from the concept of head coverings that, at the very least, we are to dress in such a way that shows we are in subjection to Christ and our familial authorities, that we are not looking for any degree of an affair with a man, and in a way that shows us as being distinct from the sensuality of the day. 

     Dear sister, fallen angels, demons, can watch what you do in private and in the secret place. And they can try to tempt you accordingly. They can tempt you through other men. They can tantalize you with worship through the form of other men’s looks and actions towards you. The entire culture’s worship of the female body is demonic! You need a sign of authority in the way you act and dress both in private and in public. Read below what a Puritan brother spoke of the symbol of authority:

“In the assembly you meet with angels and devils; angels observe your garb and carriage and devils tempt you. Therefore, be covered because of the angels. The practice of women (who come hither with a shameless impudence into the presence of God, men and angels) neither suits with modesty nor conveniency…(Such boldness) feeds your own pride, and provokes …others of your rank to imitate your vanity. Now we should rather please God than men; better never please men than offend God” Sermons on Titus 2:11-14, Complete Works, vol. 16, p. 138 of Thomas Manton.

   May our hearts long for all to worship the King alone and not us. Far be it from us that men should worship us, and worser yet, sin, and stumble because of us. Remember Christ’s Words, “Woe to the world because of its stumbling blocks! For it is inevitable that stumbling blocks come; but woe to that man through whom the stumbling block comes!” (Matt 18:7) I think back to an example of my immaturity as a teenager in my freshman year at college. I was taking a Calculus class taught by a graduate student (TA). I knew he had his eye on me and he seemed to be following me wherever I went. I began to hate his presence and to despise everything about him. About a week into the course I went to the TA of the other section of the same course and pleaded with him to let me join his class and he agreed. But the first TA still kept wandering after me wherever I was, so blatantly so, that I was almost tormented by it. I was discussing with mom recently what I would do differently now, after 7 years of progressive sanctification. I realize that I would have soon told him the Gospel and he would have left me alone. I would not have allowed the mysterious aura of my silence to continue as he followed me. I would have broken the silence with testimonies of our great salvation.


     The demonic and satanic forces of seduction and lust influence the state of affairs around us and the way ungodly men treat us. We must constantly break the aura of the “glorious mystery” of our physical beauty by pointing to Christ, the One whose beauty and glory is resplendent and infinite. We must remain broken and contrite, filled with tears of joy and Godly sorrow. I must tell you: it is much less likely that a man will sinfully worship a woman who wholeheartedly worships Christ and points to Christ in all that she says, does, and thinks. When you carry the aroma of Christ, when your demeanor carries the righteousness of Christ, when you are blameless in the inner room of your house and heart, and His glory covers you, there is little that evil forces will see and utilize to cause you or another to stumble.

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